Shut your mouth you dirty little hamster!

I don’t go to the beach, I go to the Shore.

It is finally October!!! To me, that officially makes it fall. Its time for pumpkin lattes and caramel apple cider. I can’t wait to go corn mazing and pumpkin carving and best of all dress up for Halloween in a kick ass costume! Every year I spend a good amount of time creating a unique outfit. Sometimes it is bought and sometimes made from scratch. Last year, I have to admit was a little lame. We were pirates. The costume was cute but I also saw it on a million other girls. I bought it in the store and didn’t make any creative alterations to it.

Me & Steve last year

Steve and I wanted to do something as a couple again and decided on………….Jersey Shore!

  I am going to be Snooki ( although she is a good 10 inches short of my tallness)

 Wow she is tiny.

 At least I am actually Italian, a key ingredient I would think… and I have black hair already! Now the only real issue with this costume is which Snooki will I be? There is the ” Going out to the Club Snooki”, the” Lounging around the house Snooki” , the ” Red Carpet Snooki” Ahhkk, too many choices.

Here are some of the items I need to complete my ensemble:

 And of course last but definitely NOT least, her best known trait… the hair poof

To go along with the theme, Steve will be Pauly D. Another of the cast members on Jersey Shore. His outfit is pretty easy. We ordered a Pauly D wig, because his signature trait, just like Snooki’s , is the hair do.

It was actually a little depressing coming up with these outfits because they are so stereotypical. Let’s face it though, Jersey comes off in general as a gross place and just begs to be  made fun of. Google image search ” douchebag” and you know what will come up? Photos of Jersey boys…. also known  “Guidos”… a Tool, if you will. I always knew that term growing up as something derogatory. If you have ever watched Jersey Shore though, it is definitely not. Look up Guido on Urban Dictionary and the definition is as follows:

A sad pathetic excuse for a male; not necessarily of Italian descent, but most likely; usually native to the New York/New Jersey Tri-State area. WARDROBE: tight zipper shirts, tracksuits, designer jeans, fuzzy kangol hats, tiny hoop earrings, fake gold chains, and related Euro-trash garb and tacky cheese-wear. NATURAL HABITAT: Known to frequent Tri-State area malls looking for club gear to waste their week’s pay on (most likely spotted shopping at “Bang Bang” in Staten Island). During the day when not at their food delivery, telemarketting, or construction job, can be located at their local gym tanning or lifting weights. Can be found nightly at mainstream danceclubs they read about online (SF, Webster Hall, Etc.). Most notable for cruising the Jersey shore in an old car (Honda, Mustang, etc.) which has been tinted, painted and sports $1,000-$3,000 rims in a feeble attempt to look like new. Guido cars usually have a boomin’ system through which cheesy music like freestyle, commercial club/trance and hip-hop (anything KTU plays) is loudly blasted. GENETIC LINKS: Directly related to modern day urban-guidos, A.K.A. “wiggers,” A.K.A. “wegros;” urban-guidos are white males who once exhibited the traits referenced above, but have now instead opted to keep it unreal, with wardrobes consisting of clothes from labels like FUBU and Rocawear which they bought on sale at Macy’s.

 Why the cast of the show if more than proud of that, I am not sure. More power to them though! It gives the world something to make fun of, a show for me to rot my brain watching and a halloween costume for 2010.

You know how you know the worst is behind you? You will see a sign that says

” You are now leaving New Jersey”